7 Simple Tips For Burnt Out Mums.
The problem with Mum Burn Out is that it can make it really hard for us Mamas to do anything! Let alone anything that will help us to overcome the overwhelm and exhaustion that accompanies the exhaustion of burn out!
If you didn’t read my post yesterday about Exhausted Mums and Mum Burn Out, read it here before you read this one.
I have experienced severe burn out in some of my professional roles in the past, and what I learnt is that there are 4 things you need to address to overcome burn out – relaxation, organisation change and connection. (ROCC). Using ROCC to overcome Mum Burn Out makes sense, but is a little harder. As I said in yesterday’s post, we can’t quit Mum-ing and find another job if things get too overwhelming!
Once you have recognised that you are suffering from Mum Burn Out, You can do something about it right away.
There are small steps you can take at home to start the process, that are not too overwhelming. Here are 6 gentle, beginner ROCC steps you can do at home to reduce the impact of Mum Burn Out, don’t forget we are keeping it simple.
R – Breathe more deeply and slowly when we are overcome by stress, we tend to breathe in a shallow way which in turn creates more stress. Breathing more slowly and deeply creates a sense of calm and focussing on a long, deep, slow breathe gives us a tiny space to recalibrate.
R – 10 minutes of Yoga – find a 10 minute yoga or mediatation practice, specifically for stress on youtube. Aim to do it as often as you can. Motivation can be hard for this one and I want you to go easy on yourself. If you plan to do it every day and manage twice a week then pat yourself on the back for doing it at all.
O – Your Top 3 – Before you go to sleep at night, Write out your to-do list for the next day. The first time you do this write down everything you can think of that needs doing, and keep this as a running list to add to each night. Now highlight the 3 most important things on the list and work out how you will do those 3 things. If you do nothing but the 3 things, that is okay. Keep the list going and when you feel overwhelmed, look at the list and focus on one thing at a time. First the top 3 then the others. Don’t forget, there is always tomorrow. Go Easy!
O and Ch – Change up the daily routine. One of the things that perpetuates burn out is monotony. When we do the same thing day in day out, week in week out, it feeds our struggle. So what small change can you make to your daily or weekly routine? Can you visit a different playground? Eat dinner in the garden one night? Walk or drive a different route to school or work? Remember we are keeping it super simple, no big changes if your not ready for them, something really small (it can still make a big difference)
Ch – Start saying No. Mamas wanna help, I get it. When you are stretched to the limit already, please don’t take on ANYTHING else. If you automatically say Yes to everyone all the time, it is time to practice saying No. Instead of offering to help, for a while, starting asking for help.
Co – Reach out for support. You do not have to go it alone. Many mums feel a sense of shame and failure when experiencing the exhaustion of Mum burn out, telling themselves they are not good enough or they should be managing better. Unfortunately, these feelings often prevent us from reaching out and asking for help. Research tells us that shame is unable to survive being spoken, if we are shown empathy by a good listener and we speak honestly to them, we can begin to reduce the stress of the shame we feel. So whether you reach out to an empathetic, non-judgemental, honest friend or a professional listener, Asking for help and speaking your feelings out loud will be a great help.
Co – Reduce your screen time. Getting support and connection online can be a real lifeline for parents but When we feel overwhelmed we tend to use technology to zone out, disconnect and avoid life by scrolling social media, watching TV or watching youtube. Turn off the tech an hour before you want to be asleep and don’t take your phone to bed. Talk to your partner, phone a friend or read a book instead.
You know it is time for a change, you just have no idea what to try to get the life and laughter back into your days. I am here for you mama!
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